So, some of my friends requested I tell the story of why I am known as Bev the snake killer by my friends in Springfield, where we lived for 10 years.
There was about a block stretch when you got way back in there, of about 10 houses, that all backed up to the woods and the river. We lived in a duplex on that block. It was like a Stephen King novel setting, way way back, very scary at night and during thunderstorms, giant trees falling all around you. Out our back door was the woods, you could walk down the hill, down the trails along the river, hike, fish, bon fires on the little beach down there, 4 wheelin, etc. Looked exactly like this pic below that I found on Google, without the tree swing (that would have been cool):
So I go out there, my neighbors on either side of us are looking out their windows by this time. There are 2 GIANT red & yellow looking snakes (red & yellow = kill a fellow, as the saying goes), sunning themselves in my yard! They must have made their way up from the river and they were sunning themselves. I got a little closer to them and the big one started acting agressive and moving TOWARDS me. My neighbors Missy & Tim were screaming out their window, "they're the poisonous ones, get back!!!"
But all I could think of was primal instinct. Like a mother lioness, heat rising off of me, like, this is where my dog and children roam. Seeing something, anything, being aggressive and deadly towards my children, made something inside of me snap and I went TOWARDS them with a fury I've never felt. I was thinking, you people sit back and watch. I'm from Chicago. I'm big, they're little. They should have stayed away from my children. I'll literally rip them apart. They should have stayed in the woods and the river where they belong. Now they're gonna die.
I was looking for something to kill them with. I expected them to head for the woods and river but they went for my home and retreated down a hole under my mud room! OH, HELLLLL NO. So I THOUGHT I had a great idea and got the gas can. I POURED GAS DOWN THE HOLE UNDER MY HOUSE THEY HAD MADE and was looking for a light to light it. Thank God I didn't find a light, my husband later told me that would have been BAD. But as soon as the gas reached them, THEY CAME SHOOTING OUT, RIGHT AT ME! I PICKED UP A STEEL SHOVEL (I had for scooping up the giant Rottweiler poop) AND HIT THE BIG ONE ON THE HEAD WITH THE SIDE OF THE SHOVEL SO HARD, I CHOPPED HIS HEAD RIGHT OFF! But because we were up above the river and sandy shoreline, the ground was a dirt, clay and sand mixture and the shovel was now stuck in the ground from me using Superwoman strength to kill the first snake. The second snake was coming TOWARDS me and her dead mate. She didn't look happy. I realized this is no garden snake showing this kind of aggression. I finally got the shovel out of the ground and slammed it down on her midsection. BABY SNAKES STARTED COMING OUT OF HER, LIKE 15-20 OF THEM!!! I started smashing all I could with the shovel, cursing at them as I went along. My neighbors were screaming, laughing and cheering out their windows, SNAKE KILLER, WHOO HOOO!!!
POISONOUS SNAKES OF THE AMERICAS
I knew why she was being so aggressive after I saw she was about to give birth. She was doing the same thing as me, protecting her young. But I did what I had to do that day. And then we moved back to the city. I feel way safer walking around Chicago than the wilderness. I thought I wanted the country life but I realized I'm Chicago at heart.