January 27th

Leave it up to Facebook to remind you of things on their anniversaries, whether you want to be reminded or not.

1 YEAR AGO TODAY - JANUARY 27, 2018

I almost lost my niece on that night after she gave birth to her 3rd child. The niece we helped raise alongside our own two children. The one that is like our oldest daughter.

But that is my niece's story to tell, not mine.

I'm going to talk about her 3rd child, our Grandniece.

January 27th, 2018 started out great.

You were born, and you were perfect.

Uncle and I got to the hospital when you were just a few hours old.

After we took this picture with you, we went home, thinking everything was ok.
But you got kicked out of this beautiful room, you and your mommy's room,

when you were only hours old.

Only hours after this picture was taken.

Only hours after we left thinking January 27th was a great day.

But when they rushed your mommy to the ICU, you had nowhere to go. Patients can only have 1 room at a time and your mommy was transferred somewhere you couldn't go. So they packed up all your belongings and had you at the nurses station.

But that's okay. Your auntie Bev found you at the nurses station. They had a cart with your diaper bag with all your cute outfits your mommy had packed for you to wear. And all the presents and flowers your mama received.

And I took you and fed you, and changed you, and slept in this chair, in the dark, storage area at the nursery, for the first 2 days of your life. And I tried to cry only when you were sleeping.

You were the one that took it all in stride. The most chillaxed baby you'll ever meet. Just deals with what you've been dealt, since day one. Your energy was so mellow and calming, I knew eventually everything was going to be ok.

.

When you opened your eyes and started really looking around 24 hours after you were born, it was just me and you kid.

Your daddy and your Uncle were at your mommy's side in the ICU. I was singing to you, and telling you about your silly big sister and brother. Telling you your ABCs for the first time. Telling you about Jesus and how he loves the little children and is protecting you and your mommy. And about your mommy's nana and savoo up in heaven. How much they loved your mommy, and how I knew they were looking out for both of you.

Trying to get you to drink that bottle, but you didn't want a bottle. You wanted that warm mommy milk again you had when you were only a few minutes old.

I said I know you prefer boobie milk, but Auntie doesn't have any on me right now, and your mommy is sick. I explained how happy and great you'll feel when you eat. I told you about my homemade chicken soup, and the grape leaf dolma your mom loves when I make. I promised you I would make for you one day.
But for now, you needed to drink this bottle. I told you how strong your mommy was, and how hard she was fighting to get back to you, and you had to be strong too.

You eventually took the bottle, staring at me like you understood.
Eating is awesome! That's my girl!
I think it was so I would stop talking, lol.

The nurses would come in and give me updates on your mommy. Telling me they would take turns taking care of you if I wanted to go home and shower. They wanted me to go home and shower, lol. Not a chance. Your mama wrote on paper to me in the ICU that she wanted me to find you and stay with you. Her new baby needed to be with family. So I found you and wasn't leaving your side until I was forced to.
Once, after several hours, they told me they were sorry, your mommy still wasn't stable, was critical, and they were going to have the priest come talk with us. The nurses stayed and prayed with me. We told them to send the priest to the ICU. We almost lost her, but after several days your mommy eventually made it back to you.
And you have no problem taking bottles anymore, lol. You have a genuine love of food and eat like its an event. Here you are last month eating my homemade chicken soup. The soup I promised I would cook for you when you were old enough...

Grape leaf dolma is next kiddo...

You were touched by an angel before you were born. This is how I found out you were on your way: I was babysitting your older sister and brother. When your older sister woke up she was so happy and told me her mama was going to have a baby sister. She said someone came to her in her dream and told her. (I think it was your mommy's Nana). Your mama and daddy just laughed and laughed when I told them they should probably pick up a pregnancy test. There was no way they said, they just had a baby, your big brother. But your mama took a test and sure enough, you were in her belly. Here's a picture of me and your mama at a wedding right after we found out you were in her belly.

I wrote this memory for you. Because I wanted you to know, you have always been special and will always be Auntie Bev's special baby, even after I'm gone. You even compelled me to write again for the first time in 7 years, lol.

And we went to your house this Saturday, on the 26th, and brought you your birthday presents and a container of my homemade chicken soup so you'd have it on your birthday. Because that's the deal I made with you in the storage room at the nursery. And I sang happy birthday to you, even though I was a day early.

I hope that one year soon, this date will only bring happy memories.

Because, after all, we have you because of January 27th.

And your mama made it. It's been hard but she loves her 3 children so much!

She knows how lucky she is to be here.

And you will always be her baby.

Your mama sent me 2 pictures from your 1st birthday party on the 27th. I know everyone likes the pictures that you can filter with bigger eyes, perfect skin and a crown of stars.

But I prefer the other picture. The all natural picture of you chowing down your birthday cake. Just like I told you, eating is awesome! That's my girl!

Happy 1st birthday eating machine.

Thanksgiving, 2018

Christmas spirit, alive & well in Wisconsin...

My heart is filled with love, joy and the Christmas spirit because of what our friends, the Bullis family of Wisconsin, did last week.  I wish the world had more great people in it like them.  I'd like to tell you the story of a dog that is alive today because of them.

After my dog Princess died in February, I met many great people whose lives have been touched by our plight to remove pet treats made in China off of the store shelves in the U.S.  One of the ladies I talk to on Facebook, Debbie Davidson, lives in New York and posts pictures of dogs that are about to be put to sleep and need someone to adopt them.  I then cross share the pictures to honor the memory of Princess, hoping I can help another dog because I was unable to help her.

You just never know who may see a dog and feel compelled to save him.  That's exactly what happened last week with Bullis the PitBull from New York.  Below was his story attached to his picture that I shared on my Facebook wall after Debbie had shared it, after Montana Antler Chews & Dog Supplies shared it, and so on and so on.  You share it and ask everyone you know to share it hoping someone will adopt them.  This was his story:

I know it is late, but we have a CODE RED URGENT in New York!!! Please read all of Bullis' info below and SHARE, SHARE, SHARE!!!

Bullis
Male (Intact) 
Pit Bull
Brown with white spot on chest and feet.
Estimated to be 3 years old.
Bullis was found as a stray two weeks ago. His stray hold is up and he needs a place to go ASAP. Since he was a stray he will need vetting and to be neutered.
Bullis is a very sweet guy, but is very reserved. Best guess is that he was a kennel dog or tied outside in the past, so he is not used to lots of commotion or everyday human interaction. He has been tested with other dogs...he did great, no issues seen at all. He actually seems more confident around them. Despite being scared and nervous, he has shown ZERO aggression. Overall great boy, just needs time to be able to get comfortable and come out of his shell. He does have scars on his face, chin, around his his, in his ears, and a few on his body. Not exactly sure where they are from, but like said above his IS DOG FRIENDLY!
Bullis's time has RUN OUT. He was supposed to be PTS last Friday (11/30/2012), but he has captured our hearts so we are TRYING to buy him some more time in hopes that someone can step up to help/take him.
Bullis is located in Marilla, NY. Email @ dogsit101@aol.com, for more information. Please put "Bullis" or "Pitbull needing rescue" in the subject line, to be sure the email gets read.

I really didn't think any of my Chicago friends would be able to help but I posted his story anyway.  I also shared it with our good friends from Wisconsin, the Bullis Family.  I thought it was funny how this dog had their last name.  Elaine Bullis loves animals of all kinds.  More than anyone I've ever met.  They have many different kinds in their home and I always say their home is like Wild Kingdom.

Unbeknownst to me, THIS is what had been going on in the Bullis home the week before I sent them the picture of Bullis the PitBull from New York: 

1. They had decided the week before that they were going to adopt a dog.    
2. And not just any dog, they had decided they would adopt a rescued Pit Bull.  They would just have to save up the money for it first. 
3. Mike Bullis' vacation at work was moved up a week, and so, unbelievably, here he was at home,  on vacation for a week, with what seemed like no plans.  
4. They had saved up $500 for Christmas presents.  They realized with the Christmas money, they COULD rent a car and drive to New York to save him.  

All obstacles had been removed one by one making it all fall into place.  And, he literally had their name on him.  

Elaine Bullis read how this pit bull was a "Code Red", meaning his time had run out and he was about to be put to sleep.  She saw at the bottom it read, "if you're interested in helping, write Bullis, or Pit Bull needing rescue in the subject line."  So the story ended with words like "Bullis Pitbull needing rescue."  Elaine said she stared at his picture and story for 20 minutes.  Was this suppose to be their dog?

They asked their daughter Shayla, because all of their Christmas money would need to go to this trip to save this dog.  They'd have a new dog but not much else under the tree.  They all agreed it's what they wanted to do with their Christmas money.

So about a week ago, Mike Bullis rented a car and drove from Wisconsin to near Buffalo, New York and rescued Bullis the Pit Bull.  He is the sweetest most docile dog.  He loves all of them and their other dog Buddy already.  Here he is with Mike/his new dad his first day in Wisconsin.

The difference love makes is apparent in the pictures.  The before picture of him is below on the left, sad, about to be put to sleep in New York.  His after picture,below on the right, taken just a few days later, he is literally smiling for the camera at his new home in Wisconsin.  He has many cuts, bites and scrapes still healing on him.  It's obvious he was in at least one dog fight.  But he shows absolutely no aggression and just wants to be loved.

The story from NY said a few white spots on his chest.  

But when I saw this first picture (below) of him in Wisconsin,
I noticed that those white "spots" 
looked more like a Cross or Angels wings to me.

He WAS a perfect Christmas present!

I got to go meet "Bullis Bullis" the other day.  I cried knowing he would be dead by now if it wasn't for them.  But my tears turned to tears of joy because here he was, right in front of me, safe and loved in Wisconsin.

Buddy, me and Bullis Bullis at his new home in Wisconsin

The Bullis' family sacrifice to save the life of an animal has really touched me this Christmas.  They thanked me many times, said it's because of me.  They're wrong.  All I did was share a picture and a story of a dog in need of saving.  They did everything else.  They gave up material gifts for each other and gave the gift of life to this dog.

Everyone thinks they're nuts for doing this, for driving a thousand miles a week before Christmas, taking all their Christmas money to save a dog.  Not us. Their sacrifice showed true Christmas spirit.  They opened their home, their hearts, and their wallets to do this remarkable thing.  Now they have a beautiful new dog, with a home and hearts filled with love, as it should be at this time of year.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

Bev's luck as an (almost) PowerBall winner.

Sitting at home day after day with an injured back is BORING.  I decided to clean out my purse.  I found some Powerball and Mega Million lottery tickets that were folded up in the bottom of my purse.  The Powerball ticket was from the November 19, 2011 game.  So I went on line and checked the winning numbers.

11/19/2011            9  16  17  28  30    11     x 3   

1st winning number, 9

I HAD 9

2nd winning number, 16

I HAD16

3rd winning number, 17

I didn't have 17.  
This is usually where it ends for me, 
with 2 matching numbers.

4th winning number, 28

I HAD 28!

At this point I realized I had 3 winning numbers.  I NEVER win anything at Lottery, MegaMillions or Powerball so I didn't know if it would be $5.00 or $50.00, but I was already excited, thinking I had won something for sure.

5th winning number, 30

I HAD 30!!!

Now I was like, OH MY GOD!!!  I have matched 4 out of 5 FREAKIN POWERBALL WHITE BALL NUMBERS THEY DRAW.  I thought I had possibly won THOUSANDS by this point.  Then they picked out the last ball.  A damn red Powerball:

Red ball/Powerball winning number, 11

I had 20

I figured, who cares about the stupid red ball, I matched 4 out of 5 white balls, the main balls, right?  Surely I'm a big winner.

I looked at the prize amounts.  I saw Match 4 out of 5 + the red powerball = $10,000 prize.  

I was freaking out.  I figured maybe they shaved a few grand away for me not having the red ball number, but I still thought I was a winner of thousands of dollars.  I was already thinking that JEN CAN GO TO COLLEGE, the rest would have to go to bills & a few Christmas presents.  Until I read the next line....

Match 4 out of 5 white balls WITHOUT matching red powerball  = $100 prize.  

A HUNDRED DOLLARS?  THAT'S IT?  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  A $9,900 DIFFERENCE?  THAT'S A BIG FREAKIN DIFFERENCE FOR ONE LOUSY BALL, don't you agree?  

I MATCHED 4 NUMBERS.  Do you know how hard that is?  I've never done it in 20 years of playing stupid Lottery big games. I think a drop from $10K to a hundred bucks because of one little red ball is ridiculous.

But I guess that red Powerball is pretty damn important in the Powerball game, who could of guessed?  Not Lucy over here.  I already had the money spent in my mind.  Ha ha.  And I guess that power play x3 thing would have made me a $300 winner, guess that's pretty important too, I never pay extra for that, damn it.

Now that I think about it, I've never won more than 3-4 dollars on a Lottery big game ever.

Now that I think about it, I can't believe I've continued to put money into games like Lottery, Powerball or MegaMillions for 20 years with no pay back.

And then today, I FINALLY match 4 out of 6 numbers and only win $100 bucks?  What a racket!!!  I guess just the mere idea of a chance at winning millions of dollars made me give it a shot, time and time again.  But I have to forget about all of that and try to see the good.

It was pretty exciting today, seeing the big game numbers matching my numbers for once in my life,  just not enough of them, just my luck. 

And it taught me a lesson.  I promise to stop playing the big games.  I'll spend $20 a month on instant tickets or even at the casino and have a much better chance of winning.  I won't ever win millions, but I bet my odds of winning $100 bucks are better.  

My glass is 1/2 full.

It's still good news. 

I WON $100 BUCKS!  

Our daughter, 18 & A PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!!

  (Lorens, Jen & Me.  Jen's senior prom, June, 2011)

On Wednesday, October 19th, we were invited to an awards ceremony at 4:30pm in downtown Chicago.  Jen had entered a writing competition and won 3rd place.  Jen said "Forget it, its not important, we don't have to go."   I told her parents wait all their lives for nights like this.  Nothing was going to stop us from getting there.   I was determined for Jennifer to see that its not just her old teachers & parents thinking she has amazing talent, it was the world.  Jennifer has amazing talent in everything she does, she just needs to show the world.  She's one of those people who uses both sides of her brain.  She's one of those kids that gets straight A's and is also the lead actress, stars in the Improv Troupe, etc.

(Jen freezing at the train station last winter)

I heard on the news that there would be almost tropical storm force winds and cold ass rain this afternoon in Chicago.  Of course!  Because Bev/Lucy Ricardo needs to travel by foot downtown today.

So, we waited for the train in the cold wind and rain, but the train wasn't coming.  The automated voice on the intercom at the train station kept saying there were mechanical issues.  When we got on board, the guy taking our money told us actually there was a bomb threat earlier and so that's why our train was 40 minutes late.  Just my luck!

When our train finally arrived downtown, it was almost 4:30pm.  We had to run 7 blocks in the pouring rain with 40+ MPH winds to get there on time.

It was on Jackson so we had to run past the Occupy Chicago movement and protesters near the Chicago Board of Trade and banks.  They were beating on drums, shouting, "We are the 99%!"  I wanted to join in but I had more important things on my mind.

This was Jennifer's night.

We ran inside their beautiful building with a marble staircase leading us to the ceremony upstairs.  At the top of the stairs, there was a check in station.  They had a name tag for Jen printed out already with "Competition Winner" printed under her name.  Lorens & I filled out name tags for ourselves.

We were soaking wet, hungry and out of breath, but I didn't care.  My daughter was about to be recognized for the amazing writer that she already is at 18.  As we caught our breath and walked in, I was trying to wipe the rain off my face and hair, stand straight and not embarrass Jen.  It was hard, my mouth was practically hanging open when I looked around.  To my left, there was someone playing a grand piano.  In the main area there were tables and couches with a buffet dinner near the back.  It smelled heavenly.  To my right there was an open bar.  We had some dinner then I told one of the guys asking us if we would like a drink I'd like a glass of Caberet wa wa wa (some fancy name of the wine they were offering).  Lorens got a Heineken.  Jen got a Pepsi and we held up our glasses and said "Cheers to Jennifer!"  We were laughing, and of course, I was also crying.  This was already an incredible night.

Then, award winning teachers and best selling authors were coming up to us and telling Jen they loved her story.

It was hosted by the Union League Civic & Arts Foundation.  She was one of the 12 winners of their writing competition, winning 3rd place in her category.  After dinner, she got to read an except from her story, won a $200 cash prize and best of all, her story was published in their 2011 Anthology!

The stories and poems are judged in a two-part blind process.  Award winning teachers pick 25 finalists and then, Best Selling Authors judge them and select the 12 winners. The stories are then published in their 2011 Anthology which is sold everywhere.  They told us to take some copies for our family and friends (I took 10 copies and had Jen sign them all).  She was asked to sign several books by people that attended as well.


Part of the Preface in the book, titled C&AF Review, 2011, reads, "We at Civic & Arts believe that, because of the large number of applicants and the rigorous judging process, we present in this anthology some of the best writing by young writers in the Chicago area."

She was glowing, I was crying.

It was one of my proudest moments 

and one of the best nights of my life.

 She's only 18 and now 
she's a PUBLISHED AUTHOR!


http://www.civicandarts.org/index.php/arts_competitions/winners

(Jen & Me (crying again).  Jen's high school graduation, June, 2011)

Pay it forward lesson #1/good deed #1

Well, its 5:00pm and this is what I've accomplished in my new adventure, helping others since I saw the movie Pay It Forward for the first time last night:  

I babysat until 1pm thinking about what I would do after the baby got picked up.

I decided that first I would drive to the homeless guy that regularly stands, dirty and sad looking, at the traffic light outside my local WalMart.  Its the same young guy day after day.  Every time I go to WalMart to buy some groceries, I give him a dollar or two, no matter how broke I am. He holds a sign saying, "HOMELESS, PLEASE HELP, GOD BLESS YOU".

I always have felt good helping him,  knowing what he must be going through, however small my donation.  I decided to do more this time.  I decided I would pack a few bags of things I would want if I was homeless in Chicago in October.

So I packed a big leather/insulated bag with 2 of everything, socks, underwear, shirts, sweatshirts and jeans.  I thought he could probably use some toiletries as well but didn't think I had much of my own to give.

I was surprised when I found so many things I though he could use that I didn't even realize I had.  Small bars of soap from hotels, a brand new toothbrush, razor, a first aid kit, toilet paper, body wash, matches, deodorant, etc.  I felt like there might be a bigger force at work here.  Where did all this stuff come from?  I didn't remember having most of it.  

Then I put another bag inside the leather bag that had a new container of peanut butter, jelly and a 1/2 loaf of bread.  Then I put a sleeping bag in a big plastic bag and took that with me as well.  

When my husband saw me about to leave, he was upset.  He told me I was making a big mistake.  He said the guy is a scam artist and probably had more than us.  I ignored him.  I didn't even know I had this stuff, what harm would it do to try and help someone out?  Here I was on good deed #1 and he was trying to block me already.  He told me our car was on empty, he didn't want me to use the last of the gas.  I told him there was enough to get me to WalMart and back (2 miles each way).  

So I left the house with my big leather bag and the bag with the sleeping bag in it before he could flat out put his foot down and tell me no.  I was so close to helping this poor kid, or so I thought.

So I drove to the street outside of WalMart where he stands EVERYDAY.  When he sees me he usually waves, knowing I'll give him whatever I can every time.  He's the only homeless guy that is ever there, I've never seen anyone else.

Imagine my surprise when I pulled up and there was a new homeless man there, much older, much skinnier.  I was feeling disappointed that "my" homeless guy wasn't in his usual spot and would miss out on this great gift I was trying to bestow.  I made a u-turn so that I would be able to pull over to get out and talk to the older guy.

Just then, I see the young guy riding past on a bike, he was much cleaner than usual, even clean shaven.  I waved him over.  He looked happy to see me, recognizing me.  When he got to the car I said, "I'm sorry, I don't have any money this time, but I have this bag with clothes and.....".  That's when he cut me off and said, "I have plenty of clothes lady, I don't need any of that kind of stuff".  So I continued, thinking maybe he doesn't realize there's more.  I said, "Well there's also a bag with toiletries and a sleeping bag.....", he laughed, interrupted me again and said he doesn't need any of that stuff, just money.  He said "maybe that old guy at the corner can use it, he's homeless".  I told him, "sorry, I'm broke this week and I thought you were homeless." and he just rode away on his shiny new bike. 

I was crushed.  

My husband was right.  

This guy was a fake!!!  

I had been trying to help him for months, giving my last dollar to him more than once, he had never been in clean clothes, clean shaven, or had a bike.  I felt like a fool.  I don't think he's homeless at all now.  He laughed at my gift bags and wanted no part of them.  

I was hoping the older guy wouldn't react the same way, I would be the laughing stock at my house if I returned with my gifts, unwanted.

I waved the older man over, he looked very excited and jogged over to me and my car.  I figured he probably thinks I have money and his smile will fade like the young guy when he realizes all I have is care packages.  I said to him, "I'm sorry, I don't have any money but I have a bag with some clothes, some toiletries and some food, if you want them", expecting him to brush me off like my regular guy.  He said, "Oh thank you!!!  That is so kind of you, you don't know what this means to me!"  I was shocked and excited again.  I said, "Well I also have a sleeping bag in this bag if you want it".  He said, "A SLEEPING BAG?!!! REALLY?   I CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH!!! ITS GETTING MIGHTY COLD OUT HERE.  GOD BLESS YOU!!!"  I told him I know how he feels and I just want 1 thing from him, for him to pass a kindness to 3 others.  He promised me he would.

My faith in humanity had been restored. 

AND ISN'T IT FUNNY?  I didn't know I had all of that stuff to give.  I found it here and there, from vacations past, on shelves I normally don't look on in the closets.  Then I realized, IT WAS ALL OF MY MOTHERS STUFF!!!  After she died, I inherited the contents of her home.  These were HER things from HER vacations past, that's why I didn't realize I had them.  She always wanted to help the homeless.  My brother, sister & I were upset when our mom announced, a few years ago, after our father died, that she wanted to invite a homeless person to come live with her.  She knew how scared we were for her and so she never did it.  Now here it is, a year and a half after she's passed away and I guess she got to help a homeless guy after all.  I THINK MY MOM IS THE COSMIC FORCE AT WORK HERE.

And in all the months I've been going to WalMart, this guy was never there before.  I had never seen him before.  That young guy has been the "WalMart Homeless Guy" to me and my friends/family for months now.  But here was this brand new older homeless guy, for the first time, when I needed him to restore my faith that this good deed was not worthless, and he needed me and my gift.  

Maybe God didn't want me to get discouraged on my first good deed attempt.  At least I won't waste my money on the fake homeless young guy any more.  At least someone was truly grateful for my gift.  At least I got to feel that I helped someone, that my good deed wasn't prepared for nothing.  At least my mom got to help a homeless man, just like she wanted to, more than a year after she passed away.

When I was leaving the parking lot,  my niece called me and said she needed a ride home from work.  If I had been at home I would have said no.  But now, I was all the way at WalMart, just a few blocks from where she worked.  So I said yes.  And to my surprise, when she got out of the car at her house she gave me money for gas.  So its like my gas for bringing the homeless man that stuff was paid for!  I was in a better place all around, in my heart and in my car, than I had been in when I left.

I received more than I gave today.  Lesson 1 complete.  I've got to start dinner now, so I think I'm done for the day, but who knows?  When you spend your time, hoping to run into someone in need so you can somehow help out, something good is bound to happen, to you, to them and maybe even to the world.

IT REMINDS ME OF THIS QUOTE 

BY MOTHER THERSA:

I found the meaning of Pay it Forward.... 11 years later.

The sun isn't even up yet, but I have a story to tell. 

I was sitting there last night, flipping through the channels, hoping to find something good to watch.  I saw a movie was just about to start called:

Pay it forward.  

That sounded so familiar.  I've heard Oprah say that phrase a hundred times, something about doing good deeds for others.  So I looked at the movies description.  It was a movie made in 2000,  based on a book, starring Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt and that kid from Secondhand Lions. 

I started thinking, Oprah did a show about this movie too so it must be good.   I had never seen the movie and so I only have a vague memory of the Oprah show from that day.  But what I remembered was stories of  people that were given money by Oprah to give to strangers.  The people they gave the money to were told to pass on the good deed/pay it forward to 3 other people.  That's about all I knew.  

I was hooked into this movie right from the beginning.  It tugged at my heartstrings.  I just never felt I had much to give others.  I was so intrigued that during a commercial, I went on my computer and looked up "Oprah, pay it forward", and sure enough, she HAD done a show about this movie, in October, 2006.

Ah haaa!!!  

That's why I probably only 1/2 ass watched it.  2006 was the worst year of my life.   I probably saw people even less fortunate than me, people more deserving than me, get what I had hoped for, an angel like Oprah coming to save the day.  I was probably a little jealous and only saw myself as why couldn't we be one of the recipients?  I never thought I could be one of the givers, those people had money from Oprah to give away.

Well, the commercial was over, so I went back to watching the movie.  The kid helped a homeless junkie.  Brought him right into his home.  But that's not what got to me.  It was what the homeless guy did that got to me.  He used his car fixing skills to help the kids mom.  Then he told her all about her sons idea, to help 3 people, pay the good deed forward.  I realized, hey, I could do something good for others, who says I need money?  If this guy can do it, surely I can.  Same with the drunk lady in the movie that played Helen Hunt's mom.  She gave a guy a ride when he needed it most.  I thought, I have a car, I could do that.  Maybe not help a criminal escape, but I could give someone a ride.

Commercial time again.  I went back on the computer and typed in Pay It Forward.  I left out the word Oprah this time because I wanted to read about the book during this commercial, find out if it was a true story.  What came up shocked me.  I saw links to the Pay It Forward FOUNDATION.  The Pay It Forward NATIONAL MOVEMENT, etc.

I found out that this book, written by Catherine Ryan Hyde, wasn't based on a true story, yet the story was so inspiring, how we can change the world, make it a better place, one person at a time, that it had become a friggin national movement!  Where had I been?  Oh yeah, WALLOWING.

Then, at the end of the movie, the kid who started it all gets stabbed and dies.  That sucked.  I cried my eyes out.  My husband and kids have never seen the movie and didn't understand why I was upstairs crying.  I told them this was another life changing movie I had just seen.  They rolled their eyes at me.  I had recently watched Eat Pray Love with Julia Roberts for the first time and announced that if my husband ever leaves me that's what I'm going to do, go explore the world for a year, go to India & Nepal.  Maybe meet with the Dali Lama.

Then this movie came on TV tonight and I had a new realization:

I don't need to go anywhere. 

I can help change the world from the suburbs of Chicago.  

I can find my fulfillment by helping others.  

The people in this movie were doing kindness for others through their own individual abilities.  I have abilities, though limited.  I can make people laugh, smile.  I might be able to talk someone off a bridge like that homeless guy in the movie, or at least give them encouragement.  I could forgive someone I never thought I could.  I can give of myself.  

After watching this movie,  instead of saying, why me, I'm saying WHY NOT ME?  Why can't I be one of the do good-ers?  That would be better than being a recipient.  Being a giver.  Just like the bible says, its better to give than to receive. 

And here's another thought I had, why do I need to stop at 3 people?  I don't.  I give a dollar here and there to homeless people all the time.  Maybe next time, I'll stop and talk to them, ask them what they need.  Maybe it's something I can help with.  Maybe I'll bring them a plate of something homemade I've cooked, or offer them some of my clothes so they can find a job.  I can cook, I have extra clothes.  Who knows?  The possibilities are endless!  I feel inspired.

My friend Tina called and I told her about this new adventure.  She said, "Bev, what are you talking about?  I've known you for 30 years and you have always tried to give to everyone you meet, in some way.  You're one of the most generous, kindest people I know.  What do you mean NOW you're going to start giving?"  That was so sweet of her!  I haven't even started and my heart feels warm from her words, because of all of this, just the mere idea of it all.  I guess what I mean is that now I'm going to try to do this on a conscious level everyday.  I'm going to try and follow the rules of Pay It Forward:

1. IT HAS TO BE SOMETHING THAT REALLY HELPS PEOPLE.
2. SOMETHING THEY CAN'T DO BY THEMSELVES.
3. I DO IT FOR THEM, THEY DO IT FOR 3 OTHER PEOPLE.

I didn't sleep well last night, I couldn't wait to get started on this next part of my life, this next adventure.  I've stopped wondering why I couldn't be one of the recipients, and I'm joining the world of givers.

I don't need to go to India to find my new purpose, I think an 11 year old movie, about an 11 year old boy, based on a fiction, just helped me to do that.

The sun is up now.  
Time to get started.

Hopefully stories of good deeds done will follow.

My tribute to our son, Michael....

So I thought I should write a little tribute to my son Michael because its been a Jennifer overload on my blog. Michael said it's all I can think of this summer.  I did write the story of Bev's Best April Fools Day, 1993 (http://bev-benyamin.blogspot.com/2011/04/my-best-april-fools-day-ever.html) when I found out I was pregnant with him, but that's about it.

So this ones for you Michael! 

Jennifer has always been the straight A, creative, gifted student and Michael is the natural born athlete and musician, just like his father.

One of the things that amazed me about Lorens when we were dating is that he was good at every sport he's ever tried.  I realized that it must be natural born talent when Michael showed signs at an early age of being just like his dad.  When Michael was like 5, he would spend hours shooting hoops in our driveway.  He was on the basketball teams in grammar school.  When he was going into 6th grade, we moved to Manhattan...Kansas that is.  He won the Little Apple Optimist Club's Annual Hoop, Holler & Shoot  free throw contest for his school.  He was only 11 years old and he made 8 out of 10 baskets from the free throw line, breaking a 23 year old school record.  The winner from each of the 10 area schools got to be in the Free Throw Championship during halftime at the televised Kansas State University vs. Texas basketball game at KSU in December, 2005.  He made 7 out of 10 baskets that night and was given an autographed T-Shirt and an award.  He was one of 10 kids that made it to the Championship out of about 800 that tried.  Its a really big deal for these kids.
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This was an article about the contest last year....

Kansas State Collegian > 

Elementary students to compete in free-throw contest at K-State games

By Tiffany Roney

senior staff writer

Students who like to hoot and holler from the stands of Bramlage Coliseum have the opportunity to cheer on not only the Wildcats, but also some half-pint players, when fifth- and sixth-grade athletes compete during the game tonight.  This competition is part of the Little Apple Optimist Club's "Hoop, Holler ‘N Shoot," an annual free-throw shooting contest.  Thad Hall, chairman on the "Hoop, Holler ‘N Shoot" committee for the Optimist Club, said 838 Manhattan area kids participated in the event this year.   "A huge number of kids participated, so it's a big honor for these kids to make it to the Bramlage shoot," Hall said.

Prizes for the winners include a $100 grant to the classroom of the first-place boy and first-place girl, scholarships to basketball camps, plaques, autographed T-shirts, K-State merchandise, fast food coupons and more.  Hall said the participants show a healthy level of sports-style pride in representing their grade schools. He pointed out many K-State students are probably graduates of the schools represented.

"There will possibly be future K-State students shooting at this event, so it's always good to support our local kids," Hall said. "It's a good event for our community, and I think it's a fun event for the kids as well."  Tipoff time for all games is 7 p.m., and all "Hoop, Holler ‘N Shoot" contests are during the halftimes of their respective university games.  The event is sponsored by K-State Athletics; The Manhattan-Ogden Public Schools U.S.D. 383; local radio stations 97.5 Power Hits, Q 103.5 and 1420 "Talk of JC" KJCK; Kansas State Bank and McDonald's.

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We moved back to the Chicago area after the school year when my husband lost his job.  Mike was on his middle school basketball team both years.  When Mike started high school, he wanted to try organized football.  He never played football before high school.  This video below is of his first game quarterbacking in 2009 as a H.S. Sophomore.  He completed a 50+ yard pass within the first 10 seconds of this video.  At 50 seconds into this video, Mike makes another long completion (my favorite one).  At about 58 seconds into this video, I'm the nut in the white shirt, galloping sideways down the sidelines, arms waving for the receiver to keep running.  Then I try to compose myself so I'm clapping.  

Michael was Jr. Varsity, #17, in 2009, Quarterback
Willowbrook Warriors
"Silver & Blue, Through & Through"

He threw for over 300 yards this game but his favorite part was the quarterback sneak for 2 points at about 1:50 into this video.  His coach told Mike after this game that Mike was his fantasy football player of the week.

He was on the football and tennis team for 3 years.  But this year, his senior year, while he loves football, he's decided not to be on the football team.  His grades were really bad last year and we encouraged him to make some tough choices.  If he wants to go to college and have 1/2 a chance in life, he's going to have to concentrate on his school work this year and get his test scores up.  

He had to make a decision about giving up some extra curricular activities.  He surprised us when he said he'd give up football.  He said tennis is his favorite sport and what he wants to do in life (well besides girls and his garage band).  He never played tennis once before high school either.  I never would have thought of him as a tennis player.  But he's so quick and so tall, (already 6'3" and still growing).  He's got a long reach with his long arms and so not much gets past him.  Turns out, he's perfect for tennis.  He wears a size 18 shoe (so far, he's still growing) so its been tough finding him good tennis shoes unless they're online.

His tennis coach has been working with him and clocked Michael's powerful serve at 80 mph.  He said Michael could make it to the State Championship this year if he keeps at it.  He said Mike could possibly get a Tennis Scholarship like he did if Michael concentrates and devotes himself to tennis this entire year.  There will be a lot of colleges watching. 

One of Michael's favorite players is the tennis great Andre Agassi.  Agassi's father was in the Olympics for Boxing twice and is an Assyrian from Iran just like Michael's dad.  So Michael is 1/2 Assyrian just like Andre.  Michael also refuses to cut his hair.

Below is a picture of Michael last year as a Junior at the Willowbrook Varsity Tennis Invitational.  There were 56 players from 8 high schools competing in the tournament.  MICHAEL WON 2ND PLACE.

There are preseason football games starting and I already miss being a football mom.  I can still go cheer on the team and help sell refreshments but it won't be the same.  Then again, my heart was in my throat watching Michael get hit, so maybe I'll enjoy the games even more.  And in the end, its exactly what needed to happen.  He has more time to work on his grades and tennis.  If you ask him, he's got more time to work on girls, his song writing, guitar and drum playing with his friends.  They got some studio time last week and he said it was heaven.  He is thinking he'll be a professional athlete or a famous rock musician.  I don't want to be the one to crush his dreams but I did let him know the odds are against him.  I told him, you need a back up plan Michael, like a college degree. 

Lorens reminds me that Michael IS a gifted musician, showing signs ever since we got a piano when he was 2 years old.  If he heard you play something, he could play it.  Lorens was upset I lost the guitar tuner the other day.  Mike said, "dad, don't worry about it, I'M YOUR TUNER".   And he tuned it perfectly by ear.  He plays guitar at school and will be playing in the guitar ensemble on stage this year.  He spends hours each day on Tux Guitar online writing music that he then plays for us.

BOTH of my kids are awesome in their own, unique ways.  

Even though I'm not a football mom this year,
I AM A LUCKY MOM 
TO HAVE MICHAEL AS MY SON.

Michael,  Homecoming, 2010

2010, Michael was Varsity, #16, Tight End

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